Guangzhou : Singing For Your Supper Guangzhou Style { # 2 }

D.D. Lumix’s China Travel Blog

Singing For You Supper Guangzhou Style

By D.D. Lumix With A Little Help From Her ” Owner ” Spaced Teacher

This is C.C. speaking. Last Thursday in the late afternoon early evening I went out for a walk in the non touristy sections of Guangzhou with S.T. , D.D. and Fred. While D.D. was diddling with her shutter priority and S.T. was checking out the pretty Chinese ladies and Fred was trying to mooch a meal I was paying attention to business. That was very fortunate for you guys. Check out what I discovered.

Norway To China By Bicycle.

D.D. Lumix’s China Travel Blog

Norway To China By Bicycle

By D.D. With A Little Help From Her ” Owner ” Spaced Teacher

I was having dinner with a very good Chinese friend at what was considered to be the best Western restaurant in Nanyang City of Henan Province. We were having a sparkling conversation and a very enjoyable evening when all of a sudden she got a look of bewilderment on her face. What is puzzling  you I asked her. I am curious why you didn’t speak to the lao wai  / foreign gentleman sitting behind us she answered. I didn’t see him come in I replied. I turned and introduced myself  and invited him to join us. As it turns out he was a very interesting young man. He had bicycled all the way from Oslo , Norway to China. His route took him through Norway , Sweden , Lithuania , Poland ,Ukraine , Russia , Kazakhstan and into the Nrtheastern Chinese provinces and then across Southern China and back to Norway. The slide show below is of some of his pictures of Southern China. Unfortunately I don’t know exactly where but they will give you an idea of the incredible beauty to be found in China. I hope you enjoy them.

Guangzhou : Making A Joyful Noise At The Guangzhou Shifu Baptist Church

D.D. Lumix’s China Travel Blog

Making A Joyfull Noise At The Guangzhou Shifu Baptist Church

By D.D. Lumix With A Little Help From Her Owner Spaced Teacher.

As most of you know China is officially Godless. Chairman Mao was a fuckwit. That  fact does not deter the Chinese believers however. It does not matter to them that The Committee Of 17 says that God does not exist. They answer to a higher authority. Considering though that The Committee Of 17 has been known to admit many of the more vocal Christians to a ” hospital ” in Liaoning Province where they will be involuntary organ donors it pays to keep a low profile which most do. There are two types of churches in China. The kind that The Committee of 17 approves of  is the most common and the safest. As with everything else The Committee of 17 gets involved with all of the church’s business and activities  are controlled and approved by The Committee of 17 { Sub – Committee On Religious Affairs – Local Branch } The second type are called ” house ” churches. These types of churches tend to be very secretive for the very reason that they do not submit to The Committee of 17’s  authority . Their services will usually take place in somebody’s home or an abandoned factory or the like. These types of churches make The Committee of 17 highly nervous because they do not control them so if you get caught worshipping in one even if you are a foreigner you are in deep shit. Chinese law says that ANY meeting of more than 21 people held anywhere even in your own home where religion is even mentioned is a house church and illegal. Remember that if you are a foreigner visiting China.

Now considering all of this imagine my surprise and delight when I went out walking yesterday in the Liwan District of Guangzhou and stumbled upon what is pictured below.What a great feeling to see that steeple standing up so tall and proud in Chairman Mao’s sky. Talk about a Divine fuck you Chairman Mao. I had to investigate.

I walked down the street to the church and poke my head in. That particular day was Chinese New Year so there was a service going on. I did not wish to bother them.I did have a very nice conversation with a charming young woman member of their choir though. She told me that they were an approved church but were very luck to have a liberal Sub – Committee of 17  governing board that let them do pretty much as they pleased. They had many programs to help the Chinese poor and also many programs to spread The Good News. I thoroughly enjoyed my time spent with them.

When God said ” make a joyful noise ” this congregation certainly was listening. God bless them. Check out the videos.

Kiss my American ass Chairman Mao !! lol

If You Go Carrying Pictures Of Chairman Mao # 2

Spaced Teachers Adventures In The Middle Cosmos { China }

If You Go Carrying Pictures Of Chairman Mao # 2

By Spaced Teacher

Assuming that many of you are still believers of the current political orthodoxy that China will soon rule the world I have great news for you. It isn’t going to happen in your life time and probably never UNLESS we persist in allowing our government to continue on this self destructive free trade path. The reason for this is because creativity and innovation is strongly discouraged in China. Kong Zi whom you know as Confucious and Chairman Mao are probably the two most important figures in Chinese culture and they both feared creativity and innovation as well as an educated self thinking populace with critical analysis skills. They are bad for social order is the thinking. It’s very difficult to have a ” harmonious society ” when you’re populace is bright enough and brave enough to point out the flaws in the current Committee of 17’s latest ” 5 Year Plan”. Another reason they will never rule the world is because the Chinese have the most naturally shitty attitude about life and business of any group in the world in my opinion. I’m going to give you an example of that today.

On Shamian Island there is a clothing store with an in house tailor. I’ve walked by this shop many times and always been invited to come in. Since it’s extremely difficult to buy or even have clothes tailor made for someone of my size in China I had declined their invitation every time. Finally one day last week I got sick of the badgering and went in to take a look just to get them off my back. Much to my amazement they did indeed have clothes of my size. They had nothing of any style that interested me though. God forbid you should ask for brown shoes. lol The vast majority of the time they will have black and that’s it. In any case they assured me that they could make me clothes to my order. Now I’ve been in China long enough to know that NOTHING is ever that easy unless there is a tremendous and usually direct financial advantage although they’ll deal with an indirect advantage if it’s big enough , for the Chinese in it being that easy. It would be accurate on your part to color me skeptical about actually being able to purchase what I needed from these folks. In any case being an optimist I went back in a few days with a shirt of the exact size and material I wanted. I asked if they could make me seven shirts of varying color in that size and material . This is what I was told.” If you bring us the fabric certainly we can do it. ” Now think about that for a minute. A foreigner who is visiting their city on vacation and knows next to nothing of it or about tailoring and does not speak their language is expected to go to the fabric market by himself, find the material , negotiate the price and bring it to the TAILOR. Then and only then will they be able to to their job. When I pointed out the obvious flaws in their methodology and asked them respectfully if they could please be creative enough to solve this problem as regarded my situation it did not matter to them. “This is China and this is the way we do it — PERIOD !!” was their attitude. I was also told that it would be difficult because Chinese New Year is in a few days. Now keep in mind that I’m going to be here another two weeks but they just didn’t bother to ask me about that. Folks virtually all of China will be on the move the next 2 – 6 weeks during the New Year Holiday and the Spring Festival. Very little will be open for business. My campus for example is already a ghost town. ALL the businesses have closed and gone home. Now let me ask you a couple of questions here. Do any of you have any theories yet on why after 5,000 years of history and 65 years of The New China , they are still a developing country? Do any of you have any theories yet on why there are still so many Chinese people in poverty in the second biggest economy in the world? It seems to me that if you are really that poor then you find a way to take a little time out of your 2 – 6 week vacation and get the job done and take the lao wai / foreigner’s money which for this job would be a considerable amount of money probably about 700 RMB. To put that in context the average Chinese family makes about 1,200 RMB PER MONTH. That’s probably my American cultural prejudice talking though. In America we call that a work ethic. God I’m proud to be an American of a generation that still believes in that old fashioned philosophy.

You see folks in China the Chinese have no problems until a problem effects them PERSONALLY and usually financially. They could not care less if I went naked and certainly will not see or admit that the reason I’m naked is because of their stupidity. The prevailing attitude among the Chinese that even know about their Nobel Peace Prize winner being jailed which is about 5% of the population in my opinion is ” well he MUST have done something . ” They also do not give a damn what the rest of the world thinks. They have a 5,000 year old history and culture so you see they posses the wisdom of the ages so how could any other culture be right and themselves wrong. It never occurs to them that everybody has a 5,000 year old history and culture . If you ever run into this attitude from a Chinese person and you want to totally defeat this viewpoint and piss him off to the max in one fell swoop just ask this question. lol ” Well if what you say is true then how is it that America came to be # 1 in 200 years? ” They’ll hate that and you passionately. They do need to hear it though. lol ” You see he is not from their families and the problem does not effect them personally so there is no problem. Now conversely if somebody from their family was arrested on trumped up charges and jailed with no outside contacts then that would be a huge problem. They would accept anybody’s help that they could get and should that help ultimately lead to a successful resolution of the problem they would be very grateful — OUTWARDLY. Once the problem was resolved do not ever expect them to stand up and help the next family with a similar problem. You would be foolish to expect that because you see there is no more problem.

The Chinese truly believe that they are destined to rule the world and that will only be justice for so many centuries of disrespect of China on the part of the rest of the world.They also truly believe that once the world gets to know them better they will accept the Chinese Way as the truly enlightened path to prosperity. I say that they are riding high right now but once the world and especially America gets a taste of what the Chinese Way really is they will not accept it. I also say that as soon as India , Russia and Brazil get their acts together they are going to steal all the business that China stole from the Western countries and particularly America. Those three countries are going to use China’s tactics against her. China is going to find out very soon that an economy based solely on exports and cheap labor can’t sustain itself for long. There is always somebody that will do it cheaper and I’d certainly trust any of the three of India , Russia or Brazil to do it better. I think most people would. Do you agree? There are also some cultural / societal reasons China will never rule the world also. Do you think America / The West will accept squat toilets , rationing of electricity and water by the government , censorship of the internet and media , persecution of political and religious dissent and shitty business practices as described above? Ladies and gentlemen China will never rule the world UNLESS we let them because China can only play in a rigged game and only by their rules and because the Chinese have the most naturally shitty attitude of any group on Earth about life and business. In short China doesn’t have the ” stones ” to be a world leader like America or even Japan or Germany. So why do we let them? STOP buying Chinese products , STOP shopping at Walmart !! START telling your Congresspeople to hold China accountable to all their agreements. Be part of the solution.

If you would like to read ” There Is A Promise Coming Down That Dusty Road ” which is the story of American adoptive parents of Chinese children just click here.

If you would like to read ” If You Go Carrying Pictures Of Chairman Mao # 1 “click here.

If you would like to read ” If You Go Carrying Pictures Of Chairman Mao # 3 ” click here

Spielberg Chan And The Empress’s Wedding

Spaced Teacher’s Adventures In The Middle Cosmos


This Lady is a Sister Of The Jardeen Rose.

They are the sworn enemy of the HaNazee.

Spielberg Chan And The Empress’s Wedding

By Spaced Teacher

Dalian is a beautiful coastal city Liaoning Province. Due to it’s magnificent natural beauty and sophisticated life style it’s fast becoming a haven for ” lao wai ” / foreigners. There is also an abundance of feminine beauty which also attracts tourists from all over the world. Probably because of these factors and the fact that the Chinese have a naturally dramatic sense of  style Dalian attracts a lot of creative Chinese folks seeking careers in  the movie / tv and photographic fields.

  Last October on the National Day { Independence Day } break I had seven days off and was looking for a quickie vacation where I could just chill out and relax for a bit. Since I had been hearing a lot of good reports about Dalian and since it was only a 2 hour plane ride away I booked  a vacation. I was not going to be disappointed. I had a very fun adventure which I’m now going to tell you about.

Ringing Dalian are two coastal roads running in East and West directions. One of them is about 36 KM long. The other is about 20 km. Both of them go over the mountains that come right to the ocean’s edge. It’s a great place to go hiking and that’s exactly what I did. Off I went with my camera , camcorder and a days supplies of munchies and drinks and some warm clothes in case I got stranded. It can get a bit cool at night. Along one of these roads is a Medieval English looking castle. It is so out of place architecturally in China that your eye can’t help but gravitate to it. Since this whole road is breathtakingly romantic there are also lots of very high priced hotels.There is this one very expensive hotel that sits right in the shadow of the castle. It’s a very popular place for weddings and wedding photographs.Bear in mind that because of the one child policy in China if you have money it is a great status symbol to be able to give your son or daughter a wedding in one of these hotels.The Little Emperor / Empress syndrome if you will .Nothing but the best will do. If you can afford the best then  you MUST have the best. The neighbors will be green with envy don’t you know. I just happened to be passing by one night and ran into one of these celebrations. I didn’t know it at the time but the GREAT Spielberg Chan was the photographer of this event. I figured since it was a public place I had every right to poach a few photographs . I was not obtrusive at all with one little exception that I asked permission for . The bride was gracious enough to consent to my request. Spielberg Chan being a contentious artiste was not happy with me. Spielberg Chan’s displeasure with me considering who and what he is was of little concern to me. I decided to watch a bit. Spielberg went into his schtick.

  He turned her head this way and that , he straightened her dress , he adjusted her corsage , he had the technicians moving the equipment  , adjusting the light meters , he fixed the grooms tie , he posed the bride  this way and that , he posed the groom this way and that , he posed the bride and groom together this way and that. On and on this went for 30 minutes. It wasn’t hard to tell that everybody was getting highly agitated with Spielberg Chan including me. Now you all know how highly entertaining and creative Americans can be when they are pointlessly agitated. If you’re going to have a video / photo shoot in a public place and tie up the streets and access to the shops at least be quick about it and entertain the local folks while you’re at it. I was plotting my revenge. It was time for D.D. Lumix and her cousin Cam Corder to make an appearance. Speileberg Chan had no reaction to DD taking some photos. That was probably becuase I was a bitfar away and he didn’t see me. That was not accpetable. I went closer , much closer. Out came Cam. She was ready willing and more than able.Finally it was time to shoot the video. Spielberg starting shooting and so did my camcorder. As I said earlier it was a public place. Nothing wrong with poaching a little video. lol Spielberg saw my camcorder light go on. Cut!!! he waited 5 minutes and tried again.  He said action , on went my camcorder. CUT!! This little game went on for about 10 -12 sequences or about 30 minutes. Finally when I could see that Spielberg Chan was sufficiently agitated I left him to his own devices.As I walked away I could hear and see Spielberg Chan’s crew chuckling. Apparently the American was more entertaining than the great Spielberg Chan was.

  I realize that artistes have a contentious nature but the Chinese artiste , probably because of his naturally meticulous Chinese nature , is a major pain in the ass. Spielberg Chan certainly deserved a gold star in that category. Somebody needs to tell them that they are not ALL the next John Woo!! lol

The English castle that you saw in the photo above is actually a sea shell museum. It was in the shadow of that Castle that the Great Spielberg Chan and I had our first encounter. Ahh the memories !!!

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